OK, so Dancing With The Stars probably isn't the lamest show out there -- that show about being smarter than 5th graders probably takes the cake -- but thanks to the dancing, the glitter, the lights, the judges, and the stars, Dancing With The Stars is an altogether mindless waste of time, just like I like 'em.A few athletes usually join each Stars cast. For example, Jerry Rice has participated, and Emmitt Smith won last year. This year, former NBA All-Star Clyde Drexler and speed skating gold medalist Apolo Anton Ohno, as well female boxer Laila Ali, are filling the athletes' seats, and somewhat capably, if Monday night's first show was any indication.
But the two weren't the only athletes pining for attention on the show. Jose Canseco, steroid aficionado and former baseball player, wanted in too:
Apparently, what he was doing was getting face time to try to provide some material evidence to the "rumors" that he would be the next Dancing With the Stars sports star - Rumors that evidently, Canseco was planting himself. It seems that the plan was to get as much face time in the gossip columns as possible so as to make it seem that he was the prime candidate for the spot. Sort of the self fulfilling prophecy strategy. The plan obviously didn't work as Clyde the Glide and the speed skater are strutting their stuff on network TV while Canseco tries to figure out if he really is just destined to do softcore porn.Just when you couldn't get any more fed up with Canseco's sad, depressing antics, he goes and does something like this ... and TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF!
Frankly, I say it's not too late to let Canseco in. It would totally boost ratings, even if people only tuned in because they were angry. Plus, they could boot Joey Fatone -- a professional dancer in an amateur dance competition who, if Monday's show is any indication, is going to win every single round -- and make room for Canseco's bumbling, HGH-enhanced twinkle-toes. Even the playing field a little bit.
(HT: Gaslamp Ball, Deadspin)
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
3-22-2007 @ 9:45AM
Ralph Garcia said...
All Jose Canseco has to do while dancing is move like he's trying to avoid being hit on top of the head by a baseball. Remember Carlos Martinez hit a fly ball in 1993 that hit Canseco on top of head and then bounced over the fence for a home run in Cleveland. Then in 2000 with the Yankees it looked like a ball was going to hit him on the top of the head. Canseco jumped around in an agile way. The ball missed him and fell in for a double. I guess he can dance. As for the person who brought up Canseco doing porn, I thought guys on steroids were impotent. Don't forget Valentine's Day of 1992 in Miami. Canseco's ex-wife Essther Haddad tried to get romantic but it didn't work. He went on his 'roid rage. She got scared, went into her car. Canseco then pounded on the window, cussed, and then spit on the window. Then he rammed his car into hers(that's problem the only banging he can do on steroids. The only one getting banged in the porn movie by Canseco might be the car) Hey, maybe Canseco can do the "rock em sock em robots dance." You know act like an out of control robot and smash everything in sight. Isn't that what he did at a Miami nightclub a few years back on Halloween when he broke a man's nose there? Did he dress up as Frankenstein? Canseco then said in court, "every woman wants to be with Jose Canseco." Not when your smashing and hitting things like an out of control rock em sock em robot; Or like an out of control Frankenstein.
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3-22-2007 @ 1:14PM
sports bettor said...
I might watch a show or 2 if Jose was dancing... He was funny on the surreal life.
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3-23-2007 @ 10:40AM
Taco Bell said...
Jose Canseco be showing why latinos be great lovers!
Go Carnal! Go Ese!
I be watch them show if he be was dancing on it he be bringing lotta excimentent to shows
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