If you aren't familiar with Joe Posnanski of the Kansas City Star (and his own excellent blog), then you should really take some time to rectify that. He's the best baseball writer going and his dispatch from a Sunday in Tampa is the latest reason why.After the game, the Rays invite kids to run the bases and while they are impersonating Carl Crawford, the team plays baseball cartoons on the big screen. One of the cartoons is a homemade job which pits the brave Rays against the evil machinations of Dr. Stat.
But, believe it or not, that's not the hilarious part. No, the hilarious part is this: The villain they were trying to catch was someone named "Dr. Stat." No, really. It seems that Dr. Stat - and I'm quoting from the cartoon now - wants to "use his knowledge of useless statistics to destroy the game."
Yes, I'm completely serious here - I saw the thing twice. This Dr. Stat them (sic) appears on the Superfriends monitor, and he asks them who was the highest paid umpire in 1888. The Rays, of course, don't know, and they make it clear to him that it is a stupid and pointless question. Dr. Stat then says, "Wrong answer," and he says as punishment he will point his stat ray direction at Tropicana Field in order to make it impossible for people to enjoy the games.You can watch the cartoon here and it's well worth your time.
It seems important to note that the statistics deemed unimportant in the cartoon don't seem to have anything to do with VORP, OPS+ or anything else bemoaned by a certain group of media, like Joe Morgan for example. It's more useless trivia, which makes sense given Joe Maddon's embrace of more forward thinking statistical metrics.
If the stat ray were actually devoted to things Baseball Prospectus holds dear, it sounds like a great idea. Reds fans could hire Dr. Stat to blast Dusty Baker and his misguided bunt attempts while daily newspapers across the country would be devoted to tangible baseball discussions and not "he's just a winner" paeans to players.
