Carl Pavano's checkered Yankee past is something everyone would probably just do well to forget about. In four seasons with the Yankees, Pavano's racked up about 800 injuries, and all at the small, small price of $40 million. I would say Yankees fans hate Pavano, but can they still even muster the strength? Is it even worth hating the guy? He's just sort of gone. Leave him be.

Actually, check that: According to the New York Post -- taking a break from breathlessly reporting Alex Rodriguez's transformation into Dirk Diggler -- Pavano is back in the house, sort of:

Carl "American Idle" Pavano is back on the Yankees New York Yankees ' radar. Pavano, who has appeared in 19 games in four Yankee seasons and cost them $40 million, is close to going on a minor-league rehab assignment.

See what they did there? "American Idle." It's like "American Idol", the very famous and almost completely irredeemable Fox talent show, except they switched in "Idle" for "Idol," because Pavano doesn't do anything. Get it? Genius.

We can only hope, with Carl's potential return, sportswriters find equally hilarious ways to drive such a point home. Can't wait.