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MLB

The Dugout: Welcome to Chicago, Mr. Griffey

(If you haven't seen The Dugout's answer to today's Manny trade, check it out here.)

This was already quoted here, but our own Craig Calcaterra reflected upon today's Griffey trade with, "Wow, with his bat between Albert Belle's and Frank Thomas', the White Sox should really make some noise!"

It made me laugh, but it also pointed to a greater truth: no matter how unimpressive Ken Griffey, Junior's numbers become, and no matter how long he sticks around, he will always be big news when he's traded. Frank Thomas is still around, but has become a different player for several reasons. Juan Gonzalez and Jeff Bagwell are long gone. But we see Griffey and we still immediately think of the bad guy from Little Big League. He's a relic that brings us back to a younger time.

A younger time that features Frank Viola, Chris Sabo, Howard Johnson, and Mike Bielecki. Tonight's second Dugout is after the jump.

The Dugout

**OnlineHost** Welcome to White Sox Clubhouse Chat!

Elijah_Price: Hey Jim. I, uh, just got traded here. You know where I can find the general manager?

WordUpThome: KENNY WILL

WordUpThome: KENNY WILLIAMS WILL

WordUpThome: KENNY WILLIAMS WILL BE BACK SOON

UNTIL THEN HE HAS FAUCETED GOOD OLD JIM TO BE HIS ANGEL'S ADVOCATE

Elijah_Price: You're general manager?

So you were the one to trade for me?

WordUpThome: YEP

ACCORDING TO THIS BOOK YOU ARE A BRIGHT YOUNG STAR WHO IS STAR IS THE LIMIT

Elijah_Price: ...what book

WordUpThome: OH JUST SOME SWELL PIECE OF KICKSHAW I BOUGHT AT A YARDED SALE

/holds up book

Elijah_Price: The April 1991 edition of Tuff Stuff?

WordUpThome: INDEED SO

DO YOU HAVE ANY LANCE BLANKENCHIP CARDS I CAN TRADE FOR

Elijah_Price: Look, I think you may have seriously messed up here.

**OnlineHost** Frank Viola has entered the chat room.

and_VIOLA: yeah ey ow y'doin there

WordUpThome: HELLO FRANK AND WELCOME TO CELL PHONE INC. PRESENTS THE CHICAGOED WHITE SOX

and_VIOLA: yeah ey where you want m'duffel bag

/spins around

mmmhey

/heaves duffel bag into wall, hop-steps into a hammock which is in the clubhouse for some reason, takes a nap

Elijah_Price: Jim, seriously. He looks like he guy from Weekend at Bernie's. I thought he was dead.

WordUpThome: THE LAST TIME I HEARD "HE'S DEAD JIM" I WAS WATCHING THE WREATH OF KHAN, AND IT WAS PRETTY NEAT AND SO ARE YOU

**OnlineHost** Howard Johnson has entered the chat room.

HoJoTheDogfacedBoy: /struts in with duffel bag, outstretches hand

My name's Howard Johnson. Someone lookin' for a man to go 40-40 with the beard and the name of a motel chain! I can do it! I can do this, too!

HoJoTheDogfacedBoy: /does invisible hot dog thing with two pointed fingers

HoJoTheDogfacedBoy: Look at me! Look, want to see me do Bobby's World? UNCLE TED UNCLE TED

Elijah_Price: what the hell is going on

HoJoTheDogfacedBoy: /murmurs in Jack Nicholson's Joker voice

wait'll they get a load a me!

HoJoTheDogfacedBoy: /throws duffel bag into blades of ceiling fan, runs away

Elijah_Price: who the hell was that

WordUpThome: THAT MY FINE FEATHERED FRIEND WAS THE MOST BEARDED HITTER TO EVER PLAY THE GAME

Elijah_Price: He's kind of a spaz.

WordUpThome: HE'S JUST AN EX

WordUpThome: EXCITEABLE BOY

**OnlineHost** Chris Sabo has entered the chat room.

SaboToothTiger: hullo

i um i got traded for

WordUpThome: IT SAYS HERE IN MY ISSUE OF TOUGH STOUGH THAT YOU ARE A FIVE TOOL THREAT

AND YOUR 1990 TOPPS CARD MAY HIT 30 CENTS BY MIDSEASON

SaboToothTiger: oh cool

oh well ill probly get to bed

SaboToothTiger: /steps into empty duffel bag, lies down, zips self inside

WordUpThome: WH

WHA

ARE YOU FROM THE FUTURE

WordUpThome: MR. GRIFFEY ISN'T THIS GREAT

Elijah_Price: No, it isn't. Why the hell did you acquire any of these butt holes? Why the hell did you acquire me? I'm not going to help! I've spent like 95% of my career on the disabled list!

WordUpThome: WELL GET OFF DISABLED LIST AND ON THIS ABLED LIST

A MAGAZINE COULD NOT CALL ITSELF "TOUGH STOUGH" IF IT WASN'T RIGHT ALL THE TIME

**OnlineHost** Mike Bielecki has entered the chat room.

BieleckiestManOnEarth: /hops into clubhouse with duffel bag as one would in a sack race

HI GUYS

Elijah_Price: oh my god

Photos link to player info. WordUpThome.com Photo Credit: Getty, Creative Commons

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