Underdogs! Pests! Emotion! Slumps! Your Guide to World Series Hyperbole

Most of the hyperbole in the two league championship series was directed towards the opponents of the Rays and Phillies. This is because the big media types love the Red Sox and Manny Ramirez, while generally express a vague indifference towards teams like the Rays and Phillies. Somehow, I don't think that's going to stop broadcasters and journalists from saying stupid things about these two teams.

Hyperbole: Just about anything said about the Rays is potentially hyperbolic.
Truth: Let's straighten things out here: the Rays turnaround from 2007 IS remarkable. Their win over the Red Sox in the ALCS was NOT an upset. Many talking heads predicted the Rays would finish last in the AL East this year, but many people who bothered to put time and thought into their predictions thought the Rays would win somewhere between 80 and 90 wins. That means that while it is fairly surprising that the Rays are in the World Series, it's only mind-bogglingly shocking for people that don't pay that much attention to baseball.

Hyperbole: Blah blah blah, Manny Ramirez, blah blah blah, Boston Red Sox, blah blah blah.
Truth: Manny? Home. Red Sox? Home. You see, they're not playing this week because their teams lost and were eliminated from the playoffs. And yet, why do I feel like we haven't heard the last of them?

Hyperbole: Hey, check it out, the New York Post is already on the job:

No. Summarize the ascent of the Phillies in one word: Pestilence. They have the biggest pest in baseball playing for them, a 28-year-old outfielder who was twice exposed to the Rule 5 draft by the Dodgers and returned to haunt them like those old apparitions from Amityville, and who also has the coolest nickname in baseball.

Without Shane Victorino, someone else is playing here, representing the National League. Without the Flyin' Hawaiian, Philly would be chilly and would have long ago reverted to its default state as a football town. Instead, the Phillies sit four wins away from the franchise's second title in 125 years of business.

Truth: Victorino's OPS+ this year was 105 (100 makes him exactly average). He's gotten some big hits in the playoffs, but when picking one player that's the reason the Phillies are in the World Series, I'm going with Cole Hamels.

Hyperbole: Look at Matt Garza! He's so EMOTIONAL! He got in a fight with a teammate this year because he's so EMOTIONAL! He's emoting with his emotion because he's so EMOTIONAL.
Truth: Hmm, Garza got in a fight with Dioner Navarro and wasn't incredibly popular on the Twins. I think that if you're good you're emotional and if you're bad, you're just a jerk.

Hyperbole: Look at B.J. Upton just glide to the ball in centerfield!/OH MY GOD B.J. Upton has slacked off again and been thrown out on the bases!
Truth: OK, so maybe that's not hyperbole, but I love how when Upton does something good, he's gliding and when he does something bad, he's slacking off, even if he made the plays at the exact same speed.

Hyperbole: The Rays better score before the seventh, because if they don't there's no chance they'll win against the Phillies bullpen!
Truth: Yes, the Phillies are 79-0 when leading after 7 innings. No, Brad Lidge hasn't blown a save all year. But who's watched him in these playoffs? Deep fly balls, sharply hit balls that go right to people, walks, etc. I'm not saying Lidge WILL blow a save, I'm just saying that it's crazy to say he WON'T.

Potential Hyperbole: Just know that if Jason Bartlett gets a big hit, the David Eckstein comparisons are going to make you want to punch something.
Truth: Bartlett has been a key player for the Rays this year, because he is very good at defense and the Rays had a terrible defense this year. He's an awful hitter, but he doesn't need to be a good one because the Rays have so many other good hitters. He is a mortal lock for the World Series MVP if he gets more than five hits and the Rays sweep without any one hitter separating himself from the rest of the team.

And finally, this isn't hyperbole, but we're all doomed if (when) Joe Buck and Tim McCarver start bringing up politics. I hope you all enjoy the greatest World Series since Paul Revere hit a grand slam off of King George III in 1775.