The Dugout: The Yankees Don't Spend Money

Just when Jason Giambi was becoming one of the more likeable Yankees, he goes and does something stupid like not live up to the forty billion dollar club option left on his contract. Tisk tisk.

He did steroids, admitted it (kinda), and still got to doff his cap in the final game at Yankee Stadium. That rules. I guess that's all I really saw in the guy.

Mr. Giambi and Carl Pavano both had their contracts extinguished by the Yankees yesterday, as the club options left on each of them were pricey to say the least. Giambi would have been given $22 million and Pavano $13 million, both far beyond what either can expect to make testing the waters of free agency. The front office in New York said that it shouldn't surprise anyone, but come on. When have nickels and dimes stopped the Yankees from doing anything? I'm surpised if only to make the front office wrong.

So, good luck guys. I doubt either of you will ever matter again.

The Dugout

	Online Host Welcome to Yankees Chat!
	HanksForNothing: More mush, Pop?
	WinBenSteinsBrenner: /nods slowly /mumbles something about baggy jeans

	HanksForNothing: Heeere comes the aaiiirplaaaane. RRRrrrrrrrrrrrroooowwwwww! /dumps mashed peas in old man hatch
	LongLiveGiambi: hey guys. oh, wow. you, uh... you busy here?
	HanksForNothing: What, I dress my father in a baby costume and splash his face with Gerber and suddenly I'm unavailable? Come in, come in.

	LongLiveGiambi: you want me to, uh, help?
	HanksForNothing: Nah, Pop's pretty particular about who gives him his nummers. Ain't that right, Pop?
	WinBenSteinsBrenner: /farts primordial soup
	HanksForNothing: Damn, that didn't sound good. F*** it. What's on your mind?
	LongLiveGiambi: I just spoke with Brian Cashman and he told me that all internal negotiations are going through you now. got a second?
	HanksForNothing: Sure, but I don't know what you expect from me.
	LongLiveGiambi: well, I was kind of hoping I could talk you into picking up my option year.
	HanksForNothing: Seriously? It's $22 million. I could get Manny Ramirez for that kind of coin, or a big tripped out name tag.
	LongLiveGiambi: sure, but I've been here long enough to know that 20 mil isn't going to sink the franchise. the new stadium is insulated with singles. you can rap the walls with a hammer and hear the dense clusters of bills with a stethoscope.
	HanksForNothing: And I'd depreciate our horribly inefficient yet mildly enjoyable novelty for you why?
	LongLiveGiambi: the fans love me! don't you remember all the people who poured into the stadium donning fake mustaches last year?
	HanksForNothing: Of course. And do you remember when the FBI raided O'Brien Pharmaceuticals and found nary a trace of the reported $200k in performance enhancers tipped by their inside man? That place was a mile upstream the Harlem River from the Bronx.
	LongLiveGiambi: Hank, I'm practically family. You're really going to turn me to the street like this?
	HanksForNothing: Allow me to make this as clear as possible:
	HanksForNothing: /dabs stamp in ink pad /slaps stamp on forehead
	Online Host LongLiveGiambi's forehead reads "TEXAS RANGERS NO POSTAGE NECESSARY"
	HanksForNothing: And now I ask you to leave.
	LongLiveGiambi: you'll regret this! you haven't heard the last of Jason "Motorcycles" Giambi!
	Online Host LongLiveGiambi has left the chat room
	HanksForNothing: I'm good at this. Right, Pop?
	WinBenSteinsBrenner: /falls asleep /life force teeters
	HanksForNothing: I'm continuing the Steinbrenner legacy and am just like Pop!
	HanksForNothing: /friends Mark Cuban on Facebook
	CarlNotLenny: Hey Hank? Cashman said I should talk to you.
	HanksForNothing: Suuure, why not. I could use a laugh.
	CarlNotLenny: Well, my option is only $13 million and
	HanksForNothing: THIS IS WAY LESS FUNNY THAN I FIRST IMAGINED /unloads 4 shotgun blasts
	CarlNotLenny: REEEEEEEEE
	Online Host CarlNotLenny wanders aimlessly through free agency
	HanksForNothing: Welp! That frees up a buttload of money for the offseason. Who should we go after, Pop?
	WinBenSteinsBrenner: /groan /mutters racial slurs
	HanksForNothing: He's not a free agent.
	WinBenSteinsBrenner: trade gehrig
	HanksForNothing: You still got it, Pop!

Photos link to player info. WordUpThome.com Photo Credit: Getty, Creative Commons

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

11-07-2008 @ 7:54AM

andrew.jonathan said...

If any team out there picks up Pavano, they deserve to have their brains eaten.

11-05-2008 @ 11:55PM

Rich said...

The Yankees need to sign two frontline starters, C.C. & A.J. or
Lowe. Texiera is an after thought but at what price? They also need to get younger in the outfield. Damon, Matsui, Abreu, not youngsters anymore. Melky doesn't have it! I'd keep Abreu for sure and probably Damon. I love Matsui but he seems to be getting very old, very fast! The bullpen was actually solid this year and really doesn't need much unless they can pick up a decent lefty. If Ming the Merciless gets healthy and Mussina or Pettitte decided to come back, the addition of C.C. and one other pitcher will put the Yankees back into first or at the very least the playoffs! Mr. Girardi better be careful because another disaster like 2008 will send him packing......to where, who knows and frankly who cares!

11-05-2008 @ 11:58PM

And by the way, forget Gardner, you know, that punch and judy
hitter, that really couldn't hit a lick. When the best thing you can say about a player is that he's fast and can bunt........its time to look elswhere for a centerfielder!

11-06-2008 @ 9:10AM

whittle said...

HanksForNothing: Seriously? It's $22 million. I could get Manny Ramirez for that kind of coin, or a big tripped out name tag.

haha go to hell @ the name tag quote

11-06-2008 @ 2:42PM

Look how much we saved that guy said...

Nice Progressive reference, I hate that commercial. $220 for a pair of shoes? LRN2MARKET

11-07-2008 @ 12:22AM

JohnnyComeLately said...

Haha love the Progressive reference...now if y'all could only work in that horrible "Saved By Zero" commercial into a blog, my life would be complete.

11-08-2008 @ 12:04AM

harrill7 said...

With the money saved by not keeping Giambi, Marte, and pavano the Yankees can get 2 stars. They need to get 2 star pitchers just to stay up with the Rays and RedSox. Abreu and Damon still can be productive, so with Posada, ARod, Jeter, and Cano they have plenty of offense. The problem last year was clutch hitting, and normally a down year there is followed by a better year. 2 pitchers from being able to contend for the top, and all they had to do was cut dead weight. Good job. Now sign some pitching and keep the young arms and let them continue to develop.

11-08-2008 @ 5:44PM

Ralphgmiami said...

By the way, I've met George Steinbrenner and have gotten his autograph. He doesn't have a racist bone in his body so you should delete that racist comment as it's slander and defamation of character. It seems that Brian Cashman is the voice of reason as yes, the Yankees have a history of not spending wisely in the past when it comes to free agents. Cashman is telling them to look at their prospects. I also got his autograph and said thanks for keeping our young players as we didn't win anything in the 1980s. He said "we need them." Another thing is that some players cannot perform in the high pressure media spotlight of New York. It seems that Giambi, Pavano, and Marte are three example of players who were stars on other teams but having played up to their potential in pinstripes. I hope the Yankees take this into account when they sign free agents and pitching this winter. Let's hope they don't sign another Ed Whitson, Steve Kemp, Dave Collins, Toby Harrah, Doyle Alexander, Ken Holtzman, Ken Phelps, Rich Dotson, Steve Trout, etc.

11-08-2008 @ 6:40PM

fuzzy dunlop said...

Ralphgmiami: Gee wiz, Mr. Steinbrenner! Can I get your autograph?
Steinbrenner: I HATE COLOREDS sure kiddo!

11-09-2008 @ 12:13PM

ralphgmiami said...

By the way, fuzzy dunlop, I'm white. I'm an Italian white man, formerly from New York city, who now lives in Miami. Steinbrenner is not a racist. If you did get rejected, it's because he only signs for Yankee fans. I was wearing my Yankee home pinstripe Mantle number 7 jersey. Steinbrenner only signed until he got tired as a big mob at Tropicana Field on September 2007(the Yankees clinched the wildcard then). You must be nicknamed fuzzy as your brain sounds a little bit fuzzy.

11-09-2008 @ 6:41PM

good job.