Grieving Angels Return to Field

ANAHEIM -- The Angels took the field on Friday night.

All 24 of them.

The 25th roster spot, the one that belonged to Nick Adenhart before he and two friends were killed in a car accident in the early hours of Thursday morning, remained vacant as the club returned to action. Adenhart's grieving teammates played a game against the Boston Red Sox.

Difficult as it was for them to get back to the business of playing baseball, it was easier than not playing.

After the Angels beat the Red Sox, 6-3, manager Mike Scioscia said the game provided a needed distraction for him and his grieving club.

"When you get into the game, the game has a way of sucking you in so it's all you think about, but in between, sometimes you look over and see Nick's shirt and it brings you back to reality," Scioscia said.

With Adenhart's jersey hangning in the dugout, with his number and picture affixed to the center field fence, with his number on the front of all the players jerseys, the Angels began the emotional healing process.

"I'll never forget him," said rookie Kevin Jepsen. "I don't know how long it will take to get easier, or if it ever will."

Jepsen, a minor-league teammate of Adenhart, has his locker next to Adenhart's in the corner of the Angels clubhouse. Adenhart's locker was intact on Friday, with his jerseys, pants, t-shirts all hanging just as he had left them. The Angels will keep his locker that way all season, as well as setting up a locker for him on the road.

Jered Weaver, who was supposed to have Adenhart move in with him on Sunday, drew the difficult assignment of starting on the mound Friday, the first Angels pitcher to start a game since Adenhart started on Wednesday night.

During the pregame tribute to Adenhart, outfielder Torii Hunter and pitcher John Lackey held Adenhart's jersey up on the mound during a moment of silence. When they left, Weaver still waited a moment, leaving the mound empty, before taking his position.

Once the game began, Weaver said he was able to mostly stay focused on the job at hand. He pitched into the seventh inning, allowing one unearned run and leaving with a lead. As he walked off the mound, the crowd gave him a standing ovation, and he pointed to the sky.

"I was just giving a look at my buddy up there," Weaver said, "because I know he's looking down on us."

Before the game, the Angels clubhouse was closed to the media, but Scioscia, pitching coach Mike Butcher and pitchers Joe Saunders and Dustin Moseley spoke in a press conference room upstairs about the tragedy from a day earlier, and how they would try to move ahead.

"In our next start, our ninth start, our 19th start, this whole year -- our careers really -- will be a tribute to Nick," Saunders said. "We'll always remember him. We're just going to go out there and, I'm sure he'd want us to do what we are capable of doing and try to win every game."

Moseley said there will be no time to sulk during the games.

"I'm not sure how I'm going to feel (when I pitch)," Moseley said, "but I know one thing, I'm going to go out and compete as hard as I ever have and do my very best, because I'm still getting to live out a dream of mine."

Adenhart lived his dream for a moment, relatively speaking. The 22-year-old made just four big-league starts. Butcher, who spent the final hours of Adenhart's life telling baseball stories with the kid's dad at the hospital, recalled on Friday how Adenhart the pitcher had developed over the past months. Butcher and Adenhart had been working on the pitcher's "feel" all spring, each time getting a little better. After Adenhart pitched six scoreless innings against the A's on Wednesday night, Butcher asked Adenhart how he felt.

"I got it," Adenhart said confidently.

"That was a pretty special moment," Butcher said, "to see a kid figure it out that early, and understand it and own it. It was only a few hours later that he lost his life."

Saunders and Moseley told about how they been floored by the news that Adenhart was dead, how they came to the ballpark in a daze. Saunders said he could barely even remember anything that Scioscia or Adenhart's father had said to them during a meeting on Thursday.

"I remember leaving the stadium and calling my dad, then going home and hugging my daughter and my wife," Saunders said. "It really puts it into perspective. It opens your eyes up to what's important."

Moseley said he felt the same as when his father died in 2004.

"I had to bury my dad, so I can't even imagine having to bury my son," Moseley said.

The players all told stories about Adenhart, his sense of humor and how he could mimick anyone, how he was a natural leader and other players naturally gravitated toward him.

"He was the coolest, most unique guy," Moseley said. "He had style. He was multi-talented, not just in baseball. To see someone lose their life at such a young age, with so many talents, not just baseball talents, it takes you out of that bubble you think you are in as a baseball player. You say 'Wow, tomorrow could be my last day. What kind of impact am I making?'"