Yorvit Torrealba of the Colorado Rockies is thankful for the return of his 11-year old son and the child's uncle after they were kidnapped in Venezuela. The story was largely kept out of the public eye until the abducted were returned safely to their homes, and the perpetrators were apprehended. The situation resolved itself without tragedy, and we learned an important lesson: that this is way, way less important than two unassociated, relief-pitching strangers having beef.
Tonight's Dugout is after the jump. Say word.
The Dugout
 |
YourFeetAreRealBad: My 11-year old son Yorvit Eduardo was intercepted by kidnappers on his way to school and taken, along with his uncles. |
|---|---|
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: I left Houston and flew to Venezuela immediately... they were demanding one million dollars for their safe return. |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: The police told me to keep my presence quiet, or the kidnappers would request more money, or worse... |
 |
BruneyPaperTowels: yeah man that's great but what about this francisco rodriguez creep |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: uh... |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: have you seen this joker? he celebrates from time to time. i mean, who does that? honestly |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: I don't know |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: yeah, I know he gets a lot of saves, but that's all part of the act |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: do... uh, do you want to hear about what happened with my son? |
| **Online Host** strikeout_rod has entered the chatroom. |
|
 |
strikeout_rod: Hey Yorvit, in the chatroom all by yourself? |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: No, I was talking to Brian Bruney of the Yankees. We were talking about how my son was kidnapped and could've been killed. You see- |
|
strikeout_rod: Who? |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: My son, Yorvit Eduardo. He is eleven years old, and |
|
strikeout_rod: No, who are you talking to? |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: don't act like you don't know me just because i've never done anything |
|
strikeout_rod: hahah who are you, look at your hat... that looks like a fake Mets hat, it's not even the right colors, where did you get that, the flea market? |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: uh it's a little team called "the new york yankees," if you've ever been to boston, cleveland, or los angeles you've seen our hat |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: you've got a tired act, 62 saves in a season, i mean come on |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: The kidnappers negotiated with my wife. Our family was put through hell... |
|
strikeout_rod: I just looked you up on the Internet, you have 1.2 career saves in 18 years in the major leagues |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: its not about statistics, its about getting out there and playing the game with reservation and muted respect |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: you pump your fist, don't you know how disrespectful that is to the people who didn't win |
|
strikeout_rod: I pump my fist because I'm excited! |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: what're you, 12 this ain't t-ball junior this is the majors, and when you win here you're supposed to close your eyes, lie down, and remain motionless until you are carried off the field |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: I wanted to die. I wanted to kill myself. I thought, how could they do this to an eleven year old? |
|
strikeout_rod: I collapsed and was unable to walk because of the pressure I put my body through! |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: one time i collapsed at a minor league game because i was so excited about the taco races, you dont see me pretending to be jesus christ |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: you throw 10 pitches two times a week for six months out of the year, maybe you have back spasms because of all the celebrating |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: maybe if you didn't do the ickey shuffle every time you threw a strike you'd be well enough to play with your kids |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: I was so happy to see Eduardo again. He ran to me, shouting, "daddy! daddy!" |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: hold on |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: nobody wants to hear about your kid, yorbert, we're trying to have a fight |
|
strikeout_rod: I think "fight" overstates it. |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: yeah but "conversation" understates it |
|
strikeout_rod: but regardless, nobody wants to hear about your missing kid, so either smother him in a lake or go back to Colorado where 14 people and some bears will care |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: /lowers head |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: aw that was kind of harsh |
|
strikeout_rod: yeah, but he said his kid was fine. Your kid is fine, right? |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: ...yeah |
|
strikeout_rod: and you didn't tell the media about it until he was safe? pish, if my son was kidnapped I would call Billy Bush before I called the police |
|
BruneyPaperTowels: yeah you don't know how the news works, get the hell out of my sight |
|
YourFeetAreRealBad: /clutches bloody Raggedy Ann doll to chest |
| **Online Host** YourFeetAreRealBad has left the chatroom. |
|
|
BruneyPaperTowels: i know how the media works; you are mad homo! |
|
strikeout_rod: If I ever find out what team you play for I'm gonna kick your ass |
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
6-16-2009 @ 11:23AM
Donut King said...
. . . and the non-Dugout-reading trolls at Fanhouse will descend to the comments to call B an insensitive heartless douchebag in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . .
While Dugout readers say . . . Ohhhhh boy, that was special! Nice work, B!
Reply
6-16-2009 @ 1:01PM
Goldie said...
It kinda puts things in perspective, doesn't it ?
Reply
6-16-2009 @ 8:28PM
andrew.jonathan said...
How much you want to bet if Torrealba played for the Mets or Yankees this would be national news?
As great as this dugout is, it hurts my soul just a little bit.
Reply
6-17-2009 @ 12:05AM
Donut King said...
DON'T FORGET THE RED SAWX!
You're definitely right about that, though.