As Brinson told you about yesterday, the unfairly vilified Steve Bartman was offered $25,000 by an online sports memorabilia site to sign a picture of him interfering with a foul ball in the 2003 NLCS at Wrigley Field. All Steve would have had to do was show up at a sports collectible convention in Rosemont, Illinois, sign the picture, and cash the check.

Unfortunately there's one factor that Sportsbuy.com didn't take into consideration before making this offer, and that's that Steve Bartman cannot be bought! He doesn't need your stinking money.

Bartman friend Frank Murtha says that Bartman won't accept an offer of $25,000. For the money, all Bartman would have to do is attend the National Sports Collectors Convention in Rosemont and autograph a photograph taken of when he tipped a foul ball that seemed destined for Cubs' outfielder Moises Alou's glove during a 2003 playoff game with the Florida Marlins.

Bartman has declined all offers to appear or make money off his brush with fame.

I don't know if I'd call it a brush with fame as much as a brush with infamy, but to each his own I suppose. Can't we just leave this guy alone, though? It's been five years since it happened, and the Cubs kind of have other more important things going on at the moment. Considering that Bartman completely dropped off the face of the earth after that fateful night in October 2003, and has done a very good job of staying there, I think it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to be pigeonholed with this the rest of his life. It wasn't even his fault the Cubs lost that NLCS anyway.

So let's just leave him be, okay?

The good news is that all those nagging injuries that Moises Alou has been getting in his never ending minor league rehab stints have come to an end. The bad news is that's because his latest injury has turned out to be pretty significant.

Omar Minaya announced after today's game that Alou's hamstring, which Josh told you was giving him problems during a rehab game in Binghamton last night, is torn ... and surgery has been recommended. If Alou does opt for surgery, he's most likely out for the season.

Certainly, most people out in the crowd would advise Moises to hang it up, that it's not worth being away from his family to go on these endless minor league assignments to go back to the major leagues even though he's done almost everything you can do in the game. Certainly a stark contrast to a guy like Brett Favre who, as far as we know, is perfectly healthy yet has an entire city's psyche under siege with his sudden indecisiveness. And this is not to get on Favre, but to give Alou a lot of credit for continuing the work and going through the setbacks because he's 100% sure that he wants to play major league baseball. There's something noble and tragic about it at the same time. But if Alou wants to continue at it next season, even though the final result might not be what he would want, then more power to him.

"It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." That's a quote from Muhammed Ali on boxing. Moises Alou might say something similar, except for the beating people up part. Instead, he'd say I constantly hurt myself.

Alou's quest to return to the Mets lineup hit another snag in Connecticut last night. Alou pulled himself out of a rehab start for AA Binghamton when he felt his left hamstring seize up. That's the same leg that contains the strained calf that's kept him on the sideline for most of this season. He'll have an MRI and meet with the team's medical staff in New York today.

Alou is, as you'd guess, at a loss to explain it all.

"Same leg, different part," Alou told the Daily News. "I throw my arms up."

Sadly, when he threw his arms up he dislocated both shoulders. Just a day in the life for the world's most fragile outfielder.

Omar Minaya has to be burning up the phones in search of a trade. The Mets are only a game and a half back of the Phillies thanks to a five-game winning streak. They've been doing it with a collection of reserves like Fernando Tatis and Damion Easley in the lineup but that will catch up to them at some point. With Ryan Church back on the DL and Alou unreliable, they need to fortify their lineup for the second half.

On Deck is FanHouse's look at the day's most intriguing baseball matchups

San Francisco Giants (30-40) vs. Detroit Tigers (32-37) - 10:05PM Est.

It's been a very odd year for the Detroit Tigers. After getting off to a horrible start this season, there have been times when they seem to be getting their act together and then suddenly they're horrible again in the blink of an eye. As Joe Morgan would probably say if you asked him about it, "I'm friends with Gary Sheffield." "They're consistently inconsistent."

Still, after sweeping the division-leading Chicago White Sox last week, I asked the question if this was the start of the Tigers turnaround. Was it a sign of things to come?

Well, the Tigers didn't stop there as they followed that sweep with another one against the Dodgers this weekend, and they've now won six in a row to creep back into the race.

I hope you are sitting down because what I'm about to tell you may well send shockwaves through your body and buckle your knees. Moises Alou, on his first day back from the DL with a calf injury, is sitting out tonight's game and needs a MRI on the muscle before he can think about playing again.

Alou's calf tightened up during a rain delay in last night's loss to the Diamondbacks and the first thing he did upon arriving at Shea Stadium today was hobble into Willie Randolph's office. The soreness hadn't subsided and when Alou met with reporters later he sounded forlorn.

"I wish I was standing here, talking to you guys about a game-winning hit, instead of being hurt, hurt, hurt. That's the story of my life, I guess. I'm very embarrassed. With the way the team is going right now, facing a tough guy. I know how excited I was yesterday, how excited my teammates were, how excited the fans were. I could feel that."

It's a sad trend, to be sure, but not at all surprising given Alou's age and history of aches and pains. The Mets could really use him, too. They've got Brandon Webb and a six-game losing streak staring them in the face tonight and there's not much more losing they can afford before the remaining wheels fall off the bus.

It was just a few months ago that Moises Alou (supposedly!) exonerated Cubs Nü-Goat Steve Bartman for "ruining" the Cubs "World Series." It's one of the more stupid ongoing Cubs traditions, this Bartman nonsense, but hey, us Cubs fans are stupid. Just ask Marty Brennaman.

Anyway, Alou said then that Bartman wasn't to blame for the missed out, that Alou wouldn't have caught the ball anyway. Now he says he never said that. Nice:

"I don't remember that. If I said that, I was probably joking to make [Bartman] feel better. But I don't remember saying that."

Well, how nice of you, Moises. Do us one last polite favor, if you would: Go away. No one in their right mind should care about the Bartman play anymore -- especially Mike Downey, whose bizarre inquest ended up with Alou's backtrack in today's Chicago Tribune. Least of all Alou. As 'Duk notes, it doesn't matter whose fault it was, because the Cubs didn't get five outs and they lost and the series was over the next night and a bunch of people (including me) cried and oh my God why are we even talking about this. The Cubs are the best team in baseball. In June. For the first time since 1908.

Just. Shut. Up.

Like the kid at the mall who won't stay off the escalator, Moises Alou and the baseball diamond are a match destined to end up in pain and suffering. The Mets outfielder is back on the disabled list after straining his left calf during the Mets loss to the Braves on Wednesday night.

It's the 17th stint on the DL for Alou in his 18 big-league seasons. There's no truth to the rumor that it was a stiff breeze that caused the injury. The reason, according to Alou, is much more prosaic. Compensating for one of his other injuries, a sprained ankle not his hernia if you're wondering, caused the calf strain.

There's no easy replacement for Alou in the lineup. While the Mets get Ryan Church back tonight from his head injury, their only other outfield options are Marlon Anderson and Endy Chavez. Each is best suited to a bench role and the AAA pantry could only offer third-string catcher Raul Casanova to fill Alou's roster spot.

Making matters worse, the Johan Santana trade gutted most of their high-level prospects which will make a trade for quality reinforcement quite difficult for Omar Minaya. Even if Alou isn't out for long, not the safest bet at the dog track, the team could still use another righty bat to balance their outfield options. It's not raining for the Mets right now, it's a downpour.

Moises Alou is like an old and dusty attic. Not only because Moises is old (and perhaps dusty), but the more you look around and old attic, the more you're likely to find something new. The more that Mets doctors look around Moises, the more likely they are to find a new injury.

Recovered from hernia surgery, Alou hasn't appeared in a minor-league rehab game since Thursday because of what Omar termed "swollenness" in his left ankle. Not sure how it happened, but the GM said Alou will be in town tomorrow to be checked out by the team's doctors after a CT-scan Friday apparently "showed something," which Minaya acknowledged "might be potentially a slight fracture in there."

Sheesh. Minaya also indicated Alou told him he wanted to play this weekend in St. Lucie despite the latest malady, but it was the Mets who held him back. Minaya still has been led to believe by the medical staff that Alou might be able to return later this week, even if there is a slight fracture.

Who could blame Moises for wanting to play through this, since at his age he isn't going to have too many more chances to get on the field. But ballplayers who are 26 probably shouldn't play through broken ankles, much less Alou. The good news for Met fans is that current folk hero Angel Pagan (who has cooled off but is still hitting .289), and 2006's folk hero Endy Chavez will still get at bats. But for the Mets, who are last in the N.L. in home runs, this isn't good news.

Little did we know five years later we'd still be talking about Steve Bartman. (Actually, of course we should know this. It is just another part of the Cubs mystique or charm or curses or whatever you feel it fits into. At this point -- and as a White Sox fan it deeply pains me to say this -- it would almost (operative world: almost ) be better if the Cubs won the World Series to finally put all this trivial crap about why they didn't win all these years to bed once and for all.)

BUT ANYWAY, there was Bugs and Cranks' fake interview with the guy today. And Moises Alou was recently prompted about the that fateful eight inning of Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS. The details:

"Everywhere I play, even now, people still yell, 'Bartman! Bartman!' I feel really bad for the kid," Alou told Associated Press columnist Jim Litke.

"You know what the funny thing is?" he added a moment later. "I wouldn't have caught it, anyway."

That stands in stark contrast to Alou's reaction at the time. After the play, he jumped up and down with his arms outstretched.

As part of our season preview, FanHouse asked bloggers from around the internet to write a poem previewing their team's upcoming season in a series entitled MLB Poetry Previews. It's like high school English class, except about baseball!

Today we give you the poetry of full time blogger and part time poet Greg Prince of Faith and Fear in Flushing, who has totally realistic expectations for Johan Santana:

Johan, yo man!
Can you play left?
'Cause Moises
Made noises
Now his spot's bereft

Johan, yo man!
Can you play first?
'Cause Delgado
Oh god-o
Has got a hip that's the worst

Johan, yo man!
How 'bout subbin'?
'Cause it seems
Half the team's
Illin' from toe-stubbin'

Johan, yo man!
Don't worry, just throw
If you've got health
You'll earn your wealth
Please go thirty and oh